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An intriguing find bears witness to the teetotal miracle
that Jesus Christ performed at the Marriage at Cana.
The text from the gospel of John 2:6-10 which has
been used for all these years tells of Jesus turning
water into wine for the guests of the wedding banquet
at Cana.
This however has been found to be a fabrication created
by the wine industry at the time of John to encourage
consumption of red wine.
Ancient Aramaic words inscribed on a limestone tablet
found in Jerusalem on Wednesday by a team of experts
from the Geological Survey of Israel have revealed that
Jesus was a strict teetotal and shunned alcohol at all
costs. This goes against the grain of most Christians
and was hushed up for many centuries.
John, who was a devout alcoholic himself, when writing
the gospel decided to skip over this facet of Jesus'
character which he did not approve of and changed the
miracle around. John is also believed to have received
large donations from wine merchants for including the
wine miracle into his gospel.
According to the tablet- Jesus at the wedding in Cana
changed the wine into water then handed it to guests
as an example of goodness. He was then thrown out of
the wedding with his followers for changing the wedding's
vast wine supply into water and being such a 'spoil
sport'. The master of the banquet was very angry with
Jesus because he paid a lot of money for the wine.
The tablet goes on to say that Jesus was anti-alcohol
ever since drinking one too many at a wedding in Hebron
aged twelve. The tablet recalls Jesus drinking many
amphora's of wine only to projectile vomit over the
assembled wedding party. Needless to say, the tablet
describes Jesus leaving the wedding in disgrace. He
was put off drink ever since that fateful day and wherever
he went would turn wine into water because he could
not even stand the sight or smell of it anymore.
Scholars have been astounded by this discovery and
churches all over the world are now revising their bibles
as we speak.
Hank Shanks, editor of Biblical Alcoholic Review,
which announced the discovery, explained that the inscription
was reviewed by Methusaleh Chetmyer, one of the world's
foremost experts on first-century Aramaic and a preeminent
Dead Sea Scrolls editor. Professor Chetmyer was at first
troubled by the spelling of the word for 'pissed', because
it was a plural form used centuries later. But further
research yielded the same form in one of the Dead Sea
Scrolls and on another first-century tablet. "I
stand corrected," Professor Chetmyer said.
The head of 'Alcoholics Anonymous' has praised the
new find and will incorporate Jesus' new teachings within
its world-renowned therapy sessions.
Full report: http://www.dailysquib.co.uk
The report has been published without any comments,
additions or changes from the original report. Readers
are welcome to read and carry on their own research
or readings into the subject
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